20. Let's Talk: Finding Rest in our Souls with Emeobong Martin and Ciara Lewis
Welcome to our Magnify Podcast series “Let’s Talk,” where Kathryn and a few of her guests discuss top-of-mind topics and share their insights together as women. This week, our discussion will be based on an article written by Sister Patricia Holland titled “One Thing Needful,” and although this article was written 36 years ago, the insights are more relevant now than ever! We can’t wait to have this conversation together! Let’s dive in! And stay tuned at the end for how YOU can join in this discussion! We need each other!
“You are already anointed and appointed to be an amazing daughter of God.” — Emeobong Martin
Joining Kathryn on this episode are Emeobong (Eme) Martin and Ciara Lewis. Eme started an Instagram called @PeachyPonderings where she and her friends discuss how to improve the discussion around General Conference and other spiritual insights. Ciara is a friend of Kathryn's who previously taught seminary with her, and now spends time with family teaching her children and sharing her testimony on her blog. Both women have studied Sister Holland’s talk to prepare for this first episode of "Let's Talk."
Links
Sister Patricia Holland's talk written in 1987: "One Thing Needful: Becoming Women of Greater Faith in Christ"
We already are divinely defined as daughters of God! We don't have to be or do more to receive that promise.
The Lord always promises rest in our souls when we come to Him.
Rest comes when we intentionally seek Jesus in our thoughts and actions.
An abundant life comes from understanding faith in Jesus Christ and waiting on His promises.
Small & Simple Challenge
This week we’re inviting you to read and study Sister Patricia Holland’s talk, “One Thing Needful” from an article in an 1987 Ensign. We really want to hear from you and how you find wholeness of your soul, so hop on over to @MagnifyCommunity on Instagram to join in the conversation!
Transcript +
Kathryn Davis 0:00
Today's discussion was originally inspired from something written 36 years ago. It feels like it was written specifically for our days. Hi and welcome to magnify an LDS Living podcast where we cheer, inspire and embolden each other as women and followers of Christ. We hope to use our influence to make a difference in the world. I'm your host, Kathryn Davis, a mom, a seminary teacher, and a grilling enthusiast who loves God. Today, we are so excited to have a conversation about a talk that has been hugely influential on the vision of magnify. It's from Sister Patricia Holland titled One thing needful. And although this talk was given 36 years ago, the insights are more relevant now than ever. We can't wait to have you join this conversation and hear from you. So let's dive in together and stay tuned at the end for how you can join this discussion. We need each other. Joining us today are my friends Eme Martin and Ciara Lewis. Eme started an Instagram called peachy ponderings, where she and her friends discuss how to improve the discussion around General Conference and other spiritual insights. Ciara is a dear friend of mine who previously taught seminary with me, and now spends time with her family teaching her children and sharing her testimony on her blog. Both women have studied sister Holland's talk, and we've already shared some insights, which we're excited to share with you for today's episode of Let's Talk finding rest in our souls. Okay, you guys might be aware, but we always like to start off each episode with a couple rapid fire questions just so our listeners can get to know our guests a little bit more. You're ready for some rapid fire questions. Bring it on. Oh, dear. Okay, they're not hard. They're kind of fun. So here's the first one. And maybe Ciara, you can answer this one first. Okay, if you could sit down and have lunch with one person living or dead? Who would it be? And why?
Ciara Lewis 1:59
Oh, my goodness. living or dead? Oh, such possibility. I feel like I'm supposed to give a churchy answer, but I'm not going to sorry. I'd sit down with Morgan Freeman. Oh, yeah. I feel I feel like you're such a wisdom to share. And maybe I only feel that because of the roles he's played in acting. He's just been so wise and, and fatherly, but he's even played God. And but I don't know, I would sit down with Morgan Freeman. I think that'd be a delightful time.
Eme Martin 2:28
That's a churchy answer. There you go. He played God, you're good to go. You check. That works.
Kathryn Davis 2:37
There you go. Eme, who would you choose?
Eme Martin 2:39
Nelson Mandela. He is just everything I've always looked up to him. always appreciated his poise and his ability to just love. Forgive all the things I want to be. So yeah, would love that opportunity.
Kathryn Davis 2:56
What would be the first question you'd ask him?
Eme Martin 2:59
Ooh, that's a good question. I would just soak up his energy. I don't I haven't even thought about that first question. That's a good one. You just want to sit with him? Yes. And just soak up his wisdom and his spirit. Yeah, yeah. But I will marinate on that first question. Because I know I'm gonna have the opportunity.
Kathryn Davis 3:16
When you do I want to hear.
Eme Martin 3:19
Yes, come to my Celestial cabin.
Kathryn Davis 3:20
Yes, I will come. I know what that first question will be.
Ciara Lewis 3:24
I want a celestial cabin.
Kathryn Davis 3:28
Okay, here is my second question. Eme let's have you start. What is something you would tell your 16 year old self? If you could go back?
Eme Martin 3:37
Um, you are enough. You are pretty enough. You're smart enough. You're capable enough? We're always so insecure that space right and we're not sure. And the world is really good about hyping up the uncertainty. Right. And so I think just, it's gonna be okay. You got this, it's all going to work out. And you're enough you're capable. You got it.
Kathryn Davis 3:59
I think I need that message now every day as well. Not just when I was 16.
Eme Martin 4:05
Right. Amen. True.
Kathryn Davis 4:07
Okay Ciara, What about you?
Ciara Lewis 4:09
Well, I know that my 16 year old self would not listen to me. I could appear to her in future form with all the proof that I am I am she and she is I and she still would not listen so I think I would probably just say find a way to truly enjoy high school because there's so much of it to be enjoyed I think so many times as adults towards teenagers for like especially Kathryn you and I teaching seminary we're like it gets better. It's so much better. You just wait you'll you'll survive and I think 16 year old me needed the message that you can not only survive, but thrive in high school. It can be so fun. Eat up this time make friends. I don't know I had a good life at 16 but I think 16 year old me needed a push to enjoy high school and find reasons to enjoy it rather than just thinking I want to get to college. I want to get to the next the next the next stuff that I would say, and I wouldn't listen.
Kathryn Davis 5:05
Do you think your future self would say the same thing to you right now Ciara?
Ciara Lewis 5:10
I guarantee it. And I wouldn't listen.
Kathryn Davis 5:12
And I wouldn't listen. Yeah. Isn't that sometimes how it goes? Yes. Hey, you guys, I'm really excited to talk today about this talk that we've been discussing a little bit and diving into. And we had a chance to sit down and discuss some of our takeaways a few days ago. And I think one thing that we all kind of sat on and something that resonated with all three of us was this theme that President Nelson talked about in his last conference address, where he invited us to overcome the world and find rest. And I know that is something that I have always struggled with. And that idea of rest, has sat with me a lot since that conference talk and so much so that I actually chose that as my word of the year to kind of focus on and try and see how to find rest and how to find stillness in my life. I'm not very good with stillness. This was a theme in this talk. And I just want to kind of ask you both what you think it means to find rest in Jesus Christ and Ciara I know we chatted a little earlier, and you said something that has stayed with me, you said this, the promise is not to reconnect with heaven, and you will find resolutions, but instead to reconnect with heaven, and you will find rest.
Ciara Lewis 6:36
Yeah, that was kind of the big impression that I took away from this talk. You know, there's a reason that Christ is called the comforter, and not the fixer, right? There's a reason he's called the prince of peace and not the prince of problem solving. Can Can you do those things? Of course, does he absolutely. But that promise that's being fulfilled here for Sister Holland, and that we seek to have fulfilled in our own lives, the promise is rest, it's this repose, this rejuvenation, to then go on, and face our problems and our concerns. And I love that the promise is rest. As sister Holland says in her talk, she says, when she's sitting by the shores of Galilee, and she's just reflecting on what is my purpose, I need to fill my life. I'm not whole, I feel broken. I feel lost something that I think all of us especially as women, that resonates with us, right, that message, as she's sitting on the shores, it comes to her that she needs to go to Christ and then together hand in hand, they'll walk on water, right? The promise isn't that he'll take away the waves, he'll take away the wind, the promise is no, we're going to walk on those waves together. And we're going to face the wind together. And I think at the end of the day, that's where all of us want to be is walking on that water. Would it be nice if that water was still? Yes, but the promises that we will be made still, and that we will find rest in Christ amidst the winds and the waves. And I love that she found that answer sitting by the shores of Galilee and Luke 10. Right, seeking the comforter, seeking the Prince of Peace and in consequence, she found rest, not resolution to all of her problems, but rest and I love that.
Kathryn Davis 8:12
I love how she said she went there for a healing respite. Yeah, to find that healing rest, because I think there's a difference between rest and healing rest and healing rest can only be found in Jesus Christ.
Ciara Lewis 8:26
Right? She's not taking a nap. Right? Her soul is finding rest her soul, right? She's not catching her breath physically, maybe that as well. But her soul finds rest in Christ to then go face the challenges, right? I might need a nap. Before I go do something big. Like I don't know, tackle my toddler. But I need Jesus before I do something that's going to take a toll on my Spirit on my soul, on my mind on my heart and Jesus offers that rest.
Kathryn Davis 8:55
Ciara Have you ever felt like that before? Maybe like Sister Holland where you needed that rest?
Ciara Lewis 9:02
Basically every day? But no, yeah, recently, I obviously taught seminary with you and recently leaving that behind and taking a break to have my daughter and now have my two kids. I have felt that same disconnect from myself that loss of identity loss of purpose. I'm not enough what am I doing? It's very much a restlessness in the soul and uneasiness you feel unsettled and I felt that for the last couple of months and I still feel it and I'm still dealing with it and coping with it losing that part of me that teaching with the youth and and being with you guys as a faculty losing that and that connection to you guys that fulfillment in my own strengths and talents of teaching losing that left a void. I definitely have seen since reading this talk and a little bit before that When I sent her myself on that one thing needful that one thing that is Jesus When I take time for him, he fills those holes in my heart. He doesn't solve my problems. I'm not teaching seminary. My kids are so crazy. My right infant still won't take a binky, but he fills me. He makes me whole, even when my life is feeling pretty broken. And that's something that only heaven can do only him.
Kathryn Davis 10:21
I love that. So I want to ask both of you, but I want to ask Eme what you think finding rest in Him looks like?
Eme Martin 10:29
I think it's finding peace, in him peace in the path. And the perspective that he gives, you know, I just came from lunch earlier today with a girlfriend who is going through it, she's an active sister to the church and is actively trying to find the Lord's path for her life. And there's a lot complicated in that searching in that seeking. And yet, in the midst of these burdens, she said, but I have peace, I trust in the Lord. And I know that he's guiding my way. And I don't know when or what, but I know him. And that's okay, that's enough. And I think we can all get to that space, when we know the Master well enough, that we know how he operates with us. There is truly peace in the path, and the ponderings and, and all the things are settled in in him. And so it makes me think of the song there's peace in Christ, there absolutely is. And when we turn to Him, that peace settles us and then we truly know the definition of that peace that surpasses understanding, because it may not logically make sense, with 500 things on your plate and in your heart. But when he gives you that peace, then that is rest that is respite.
Kathryn Davis 11:47
So how do you tap into that every day? How do you tap into that peace or that rest?
Eme Martin 11:53
You know, it starts at the top of the day, hopefully waking up from a restful night. No. But you know, it's also...
Kathryn Davis 12:00
Ciara's like that never happens for me.
Eme Martin 12:04
Rest? Sleep? Tell me more. Those of us with out newborns who like to close our eyes a little bit every night. It really starts with that open communication, that first communication for me. And that just settles my soul. And helps me to remember to come back to that when I'm feeling restless when I'm feeling anxious when I'm feeling overwhelmed. Later in the day, or five minutes later, like whatever that is, right? It just helps me to recenter and say, Okay, well, let's come back. Let's remember what we just talked about. Let's go back to prayer again, as necessary. The scriptures, so many great examples of peace and rest and strength, I find strength in you know, the words of Isaiah the words that empower us. And then the examples of those who've been there done that, and had hard times and overcome them. That's it for me. And it's throughout the day to like, you know, I think sometimes we're like, Okay, check mark, I've set my prayers, I've read my scriptures, I'm good to go for the day, no, look at the next 12 to 18 hours, you're not good, because you're gonna get some bad news or, you know, someone's gonna offend you or life gets difficult or you've missed a deadline or, or right, but returning to these things. And so having, you know, maybe some scripture in the background, I love to have general conference in the background, when I can work on some things in, you know, not too busy with my requirements of the day, but finding ways to return to that space of rest. And whatever that looks like is so important too throughout the day.
Kathryn Davis 13:36
So important. And Ciara, I want to ask you that question. Where do you tap into rest? Because I know what it's like to have a lot of young children in your home. And we can't all go to the shores of Galilee, like Sister Holland, to find rest. And I think it's crucial that we try and tap into that. And like I'm saying, I'm not good at it. So what do you do to try and find rest? On a day to day?
Ciara Lewis 14:05
Sure. Yeah, I think for me, it looks different. Day to day, completely different, right? One day, it might be hitting my knees in prayer and getting a solid amount of time where no child needs me that I can just unload to My Father in heaven. Sometimes it is the scriptures and sometimes I do get a solid scripture study if both kids naps align, but like you said, it's hard. Like whether you have little kids or older kids or even no kids, you have a life and life hits hard and it gets busy and gets messy and chaotic. And I think some days I seek Christ through my knees and through reading the scriptures. Some days I go to my piano, and I play hymn arrangements. Other days I snuggle with my son and I breathe deeply other days I am watercoloring. But at the end of the day, the common thread through all of these things is that I am intentionally seeking Jesus, whether in my actions like prayer and scripture study, or in my thoughts. I I'm intentionally seeking something beyond what this life has to offer. I'm trying to live that joyful and sacred sacrament promise of, hey, I'm gonna remember you. Please send me your spirit. Please send me the comforter, I found rest in Jesus in the pages of my scriptures just as much as I found him in the canyons of Lake Powell, right? It doesn't matter where you are, doesn't matter what you're doing matters that you're turned towards Jesus Christ, and you're intentionally seeking Him. So I think it's different day to day for me seeking Him. Honestly, it looked like sitting down and having breakfast with my toddler because my infant was napping, and I got to look at this little boy, who is just so amazing. And be with him and count my blessings, particularly him. How is that not seeking Jesus? Right? I don't know. I think we make it too much of a checklist. And we really just need to strip it down and think about okay, have I thought out my savior today? Yeah, have I thought of him? Have I hoped for him? Have I prayed to God in His name? Have I done anything to kind of inch towards my savior? Whether, it's, again, an inch, or maybe a bigger step. But it looks different for me every single day.
Eme Martin 16:09
Ciara, I love how you say that. Because that makes me think of Elder Christofferson's talk our daily bread. And it's to the point that you made everyday, it's different. But ultimately, Christ is at the center. And just as the children of Israel had to go and get that daily manna, the Lord wants us to daily come to Him. Because He knows that if we don't, we're quick to forget, right. And so as we daily come to Him, in whatever way that looks like, he just wants to be connected. It can look like this, it can look like that doesn't matter, I just want you to look at me, ultimately, I want you to come to me, see me and connect with me. And so recognizing that every day it will be different. And that's okay. In fact, that is the way right as long as we're looking at him. So I love that.
Kathryn Davis 16:57
I think that's so important. It actually reminds me a couple weeks ago, with magnify, we did this challenge on every day to connect with the divine. And one of the days was to convert the commute to kind of either listen to a conference talk or a hymn, and I listened to that a lot in my car. But I don't always have silence in my car. So that day, I just drove with silence and tried to connect with my heavenly Father. And lately I have really been sorry, missing my mom. And I've been wanting to hear her voice. And so as it was silent in the car, I have one message from my mom that's still on my phone. And so I played that message and just to be able to hear her voice filled me with so much peace and comfort. And I immediately thought of Heavenly Father, do you think he longs to hear our voice? The same way I longed to hear my mom's? And I just think of that daily connect, like he longs to hear us and hear our voice. And can we just turn to him for a moment and connect with him. And I think that leads into something we talked a lot about. And maybe it's perhaps because we've lost this ability to find rest. Or as women, we find comfort in our busy schedule, or we find validation in our busy schedule. And we think it's common that we have to do more and more and more and more, and then we're making a difference. And we talked a little bit about abundance, and the abundance of our Heavenly Father. And abundance doesn't always mean we need to do more. And so both of you talked a little bit about how we already have that abundance within us. So can I hear a little bit about what you think about doing more or being more?
Eme Martin 18:51
You know, more is less. And I think it's easy to forget that because the world teaches us that more is more or that's supposedly how it should be right? If I've got more followers, if I've got more titles, more money, more vacations, more posts, whatever that is, then I am doing the most and I'm doing great. And yet the Lord has told us that if you come unto me, I will fill you. That if you turn to me, I heal you I'm all that you need. Not the ways of the world or what you think and so, understanding you know, like I you asked me about my 16 year old self like remembering you are enough. You already are divinely appointed and anointed to be amazing daughter of God.
Kathryn Davis 19:44
Can you repeat, appointed and anointed?
Eme Martin 19:47
Yes, we all are appointed and anointed to be an amazing daughter of God. What that looks like for each of us is going to be different, right? Like maybe I'm appointed and anointed to be a physician. Maybe I'm anointed and appointed to be a mother 12. Maybe I'm anointed and appointed to be a teacher. And you know, we're all teachers in in different ways. But whatever that looks like, we are already endowed with that power, God has already given us that gift. We are divinely his created in His image. And we just refine that divine in our lives through the covenants we keep through studying and staying close to him. And so there's so much more but honestly, less is more because you don't have to list out all these other things kind of like President Nelson taught young single adults last year, knowing that identity as a child of God, everything else rolls up under that you are a child of God. And that is enough. That's all of it. I love that.
Ciara Lewis 20:48
Refine the divine. I love that a lot. I love also the idea that this abundant life as women, we want that abundance to be external. I think that doesn't always mean in materialistic things. But we want the checklist we want the to-dos because it feels so good to check something off or to erase it from our to do list. No, it's so good.
Kathryn Davis 21:06
That's validating. It's like, Oh, I did it.
Ciara Lewis 21:09
I did it right. No, it's so validating it is I can tell you that I've fallen prey to that as now a stay at home mom, where I got a lot of fulfillment from teaching the youth in seminary, I felt needed. I felt like I had such a purpose. And not that I don't at home, of course I do with my kids. But we also want something beyond that, right? We don't want this solo identity. This, I am a mom and nothing more. And so I've fallen prey to making the list. And usually it's cleaning my house and getting the groceries. It's the do's and what's so interesting is that it's actually that list that drives me insane. It's that list that ends up breaking me that list makes me need to then seek out that wholeness in Christ. And for some reason, we're wired that way that abundance, we do need more and more and more and like Eme said, no less is more back off. And not only just less is more, but you you as you are as a child of God that you already are. Joseph B Wirthlin actually gave a talk back in 2006. It's called the abundant life. But he says in it he says the abundant life comes through faith, hope and charity and it comes to those who in spite of hardship and sorrow, understand the words of one writer who said in the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an Invincible summer. And I love that idea that I love that we are in winter not only quite literally over here in winter. In the three degrees in the mornings, no, not only are we actually in winter, no we pass through winters on the daily. And to remember that that invincible summer that for better word eternal summer is within us already that we are divine. We're not here to become a daughter of God, no, I already am a daughter of God trying to become more like Him. And that's when abundance is found. It's finding more of me that is like God already. And tapping into that abundance of God within me so that I can then hopefully share it with others and share more of me more of him with others. Right?
Eme Martin 23:12
More of me that's like him. I love that. I love that.
Kathryn Davis 23:16
Because if you know he is our Father and our Creator, He is in us and to find more of him in us. Yes, so good. I think it goes so well with what Sister Holland said in that talk. She said, I believe we can find our steady footing and stilling of the soul by turning away from physical preoccupations, Superwoman accomplishments and endless popularity contests, and returning instead to the wholeness of our soul.
Ciara Lewis 23:43
Returning, that's the word she uses is returning to that, right? It's already there. And we were already there. And so we're not discovering it, we're not finding it a new we're returning to it. I just think that's a key word that it's already there.
Kathryn Davis 23:56
That is powerful. We don't have to create it. It's within us.
Eme Martin 24:00
I was just gonna say I feel like that's the lie The world perpetually whispers in our ears that we have to do more to be more creative, more, more, more, more like this layer of do, do, do, in order to be defined. And we don't, again, we are divinely defined, because we are his and because He's created us in His image. And so we don't have to pad our lives with different identities and different titles and responsibilities. We are enough and the things that the Lord is leading us to do within the divinity as a daughter of God, we are enough. That's it. That is the errand. That is a purpose. That is why we're here.
Kathryn Davis 24:41
I like what you said right there that we are divinely defined. Yeah. And don't you think sometimes that it's hard for us to find rest and wholeness? Because we're not looking at being divinely defined. But we're looking at what everybody else is doing. And we're comparing ourselves I think there's something really profound that Sister Holland says in this talk, we often worry so much about pleasing and performing for others that we lose our uniqueness, that full and relaxed acceptance of oneself as a person of worth and individuality. Eme, I know you mentioned that our differences don't divide us, but they can bring us closer to one another and closer to being Christ centered. Can you expound on that a little bit? And tell me what you mean by that?
Eme Martin 25:28
Sure. So I think, you know, the adversary, again, he would love for us to be at odds. I mean, he is the father of lies, He is the Great Deceiver, he loves contention, right. And so if we can find ways to counteract that, and recognize that our differences actually are what help us, they define, they honestly define the divinity within us, right? Because the Lord is unique in creating us in His image. And with the colors and the purpose and the depth of what that is, we're able to connect with each other in ways that are unique. And yet, so alike right, you can go to a garden and see a plethora of roses, but no two are the same. And yet, they still add to the beauty of the garden, it makes for this beautiful array. And so understanding that, just because I don't grow like you, it's not a bad thing. In fact, treasure that, you know, be unique and honor and walk in that I'm still a part of the garden. And we're a major part and we come together to make this beauty like and so don't get caught up in and letting differences divide, celebrate them as divine, and how they help us learn more of the sacred and learn more of the father, and one another. You know, I think that is why we're here to learn that the differences are divine and not divisive.
Kathryn Davis 27:00
Have you been able to see that in your ward or in your community where maybe that diversity has brought others closer to Jesus Christ?
Eme Martin 27:10
Yeah. And you know, it's not easy. I think, again, because the the father of all lies and the father of contention and Satan would love to have you look at the low hanging fruit of a well, we're different. So we can't do all the things we can't do all the ways that this divides us and keeps us from being together. But you know, one of the beautiful things about recently having the DC temple open house, it was such a sweet opportunity to literally invite the world to come and see in the DC area, you know, we've got all the embassies here. And so we literally have the world as our neighbors, our friends who are here, and we open up the doors of his house. And without respect to religion, or background or money, everyone was invited to come and see. And it was so powerful, because regardless of again, your religiosity or lack thereof, you came and you felt it, you knew that there is a power in this place, and you wanted to occupy that space, and you didn't want to leave. And it was so sweet to feel that. And even if we didn't speak the same verbiage, or, you know, have the same insight, we all divinely as his children understood that we are His children, we felt that divinity, we felt that spirit, we felt that love. And our differences actually made us more divinely connected. It was beautiful for those few weeks of the open house and yeah, I was just talking with some friends. We would love to copy and paste that. We're so happy the temple's back open two hours to Philly was, but it was just to copy and paste that feeling again here for so beautiful.
Ciara Lewis 28:53
I love I love the imagery of a temple too. I mean, Sister Holland even mentions temples, right? It's her box, right? She lists the boxes of how finding a wholeness of your soul happens I guess more smoothly. Her analogy was these boxes, these five boxes, right? There's prayer, there's scriptures and she lists them and that fifth one is comparing the beauty of our souls with the holiness of our of our temples. And I think very often we think of, oh, our body is a Temple. Well, no our soul as a temple. It's not just our body, it's our it's our mind, our heart, our spirit. It's our soul, that is this embodiment of God we are made in His image, right? And so to go along with that amazing story of of the open house, I think, just as every single temple is completely different, they look completely different. But they are strikingly beautiful, because every single one of them contains the strikingly beautiful ordinances and covenants that connect us to heaven. And so we are all very different. As women we look different, we sound different. We have different hobbies we have different interests we prioritize differently. But what makes us strikingly beautiful in heaven's eyes is that we take in these ordinances and covenants into our heart right? That we connect with heaven. And I think, what is it the Sister Holland says, she says, I testified that you are holy, that divinity is abiding within you waiting to be uncovered to be unleashed, and magnified and demonstrated, all in comparison to our holy temples.
Kathryn Davis 30:25
So powerful. I testify that you are holy, I need to put that one up and remind myself of that on the daily I think one thing that sister Holland notes that I also think is so important, as she says that no woman has cornered the market on concerns that there are plenty of challenges we face today, but also so many blessings. I think the world and Satan try to use our trials to sometimes pit women against each other. But like we mentioned, we can celebrate our differences, and gain important friendships and sisterhood through charity. I think through that unification, we can develop a sisterhood. But I think the world is really good at dividing us. We're so good at comparing, I don't know, why as women we're so good at comparing ourselves. And so I want to know, how do you guys find ways to gain a sisterhood as you face this in the world? Because sister Holland talks about, like this importance of a sisterhood and and sometimes we might not feel that. So how can we gain that sisterhood to help us?
Ciara Lewis 31:33
I think it's difficult, right? Depending on what stage of life you're in.
Kathryn Davis 31:37
It's really hard Ciara.
Ciara Lewis 31:38
For me, it's very difficult right now when it's cold. So I do not leave my house. I don't I stay at home with my two kids locked in these walls No. Difficult. We actually just recently moved up to Lehi, I was down in Pleasant Grove and in the last ward that I was in. So I was called into the primary presidency, I was one of the counselors and my closest friends in that Ward was that presidency, they were so special to me. And we did not spend a lot of time together outside of church, and we had a group chat. But those relationships, those moments where we would text each other, whether it was about primary or not. And those moments on Sunday, that hour of primary where I got to not only be with the kids, but I got to be with these amazing sisters. It was healing for me. Right? Not only does Christ heal us, I think we have a power to heal each other and to help each other to be lowercase saviors on Mount Zion and, and that's what these sisters were for me and, and I miss them so much. And so it's a bummer that we moved. But that was such an example to me of man. That's why church is so critical here not only to partake of that bread and water. But also we're commanded to gather, we are commanded to gather and to form relationships and to serve one another and how beautiful that this organization sets up a way for us to do that. And so for me right now, in my life, in this stage, the best way for me to form powerful sisterhood is that it's being at church and accepting a calling and trying to fulfill that calling because oh, that calling can also fill me that's kind of where I'm at before it was very much my faculty and you, Kathryn and I had friends in these teenagers that were just beautiful friendships. And right now it's it's church, I am clinging to the community that church can be. Because until it warms up, I'm not leaving this house. I need those. I need those relationships there. But that's what it looks like for me right now is grasping on to the community that is church and neighbors.
Eme Martin 33:36
Clinging to the community. I love that it's kind of like the iron rod, right? We just need to hold tight. For sure.
Kathryn Davis 33:42
Yeah. And it reminds me of that, quote, Ciara, when you're talking about the bread and water. Elder Holland has this great quote. And it's talking about that there's a reason why we partake of the sacrament together that as we partake of the sacrament, and renew our covenants and ask for that healing power, to heal my weaknesses and my hurts and my sorrows, that we take that together as a community, to lift and strengthen each other, that there's a reason why we take the sacrament together.
Ciara Lewis 34:17
Well, what better connective tissue than to recognize that we all need Jesus. Right? What better way to not compare and contrast to others than to find common ground and look at all of us broken people just trying to come to our healer, and find rest and find healing. And yeah, I remember having that kind of moment on my mission where I was sitting in sacrament and it kind of hit me, oh my gosh, like we're all just a bunch of broken people, trying our best and trying to reach out for Jesus. And that's the best way to connect right is to find that similarity, not just other similarities of hobbies and interests, and I don't know geography and where we live, but Jesus.
Eme Martin 34:59
Well, I think there's, there's a power there, when you flip that comparison to compassion. And rather than saying, Oh, well, what do you have That I don't? But it's recognizing that, wow, maybe this means x about you, maybe you're having a difficult time. Maybe, you know, this blessing doesn't necessarily make me less than but it means Oh, wow. How can I maybe take some notes from you, and learn how to be more Christ, like, as opposed to lay that comparison be the thief of our joy, but flipping that into an opportunity to have more sympathy, more empathy, and connect in community and in love with that person?
Kathryn Davis 35:41
Well, Sister Holland even says, she says, Whatever our circumstance, we can reach out, touch, hold, lift and nurture. But we cannot do it in isolation. We need a community of sisters, stilling the soul, and binding the wounds of fragmentation. And Eme have you felt that have you felt a community of sisters at times to bind your wounds?
Eme Martin 36:08
For sure. My current calling as a Relief Society president, obviously, I've got a very unique bird's eye view to how that is. But for me in my life, my sisters are my strength. like I love to just dine and dish with a sister or two and just connect and have that it lifts my spirit. And I hopefully do my best to lift, but it's just so sweet and so uplifting, to share that space to share that spirit. So you know, as Ciara said, to recognize, we're on the same page. Oh, we're going through life. Yay. It's alright. Now, yay. You know, but I've got someone by my side who gets that. And it's not that it's a bowl of cherries, but you know, we're going to take the bitter with the sweet and we're going to press forward and I know that you're here to support me, and cheerlead me and there's so much peace in that and so much strength in that so absolutely.
Kathryn Davis 37:03
Love that support and cheerlead me, because I think we need cheerleaders in the hard times, and in the successes as well. Yes. And if we can learn to cheer on the successes of our sisters, I think that brings like Sister Holland said that binding and helps heal some wounds of fragmentation, right? Instead of the comparing can we cheer each other on? Yes.
Eme Martin 37:30
Well, there's so many critics, right, channeling some President Hinckley, like, there's so many negative people out there be the light be the brightness in someone's life as opposed to the burden or the person that's tearing them down. We all need someone in our corner on to us. There's so many different things that can try to shake or break us. Why not be the joy and be the light, the the peace, the the blessing in someone's life.
Kathryn Davis 37:59
I love that you guys, thank you so much. Thank you for being lights to me. Right? Thank you for being examples of Jesus Christ for me. And I think together. I love that what she says right there. We can't do it in isolation, but we need each other. And so thank you for being that for me. You guys are the best this year.
Eme Martin 38:20
But Ciara, That means you might have to leave your house. No. You might have to sneak out into the snow.
Ciara Lewis 38:26
this is what social media was created for I can connect isolation. Just kidding.
Kathryn Davis 38:38
You guys, seriously, thank you so much. We like to end every episode with a small and simple invitation something that we can implement throughout the week. And this week, we're inviting you to read and study sister Patricia Holland's talk one thing needful, which will be linked in our show notes. We really want to hear from you. And we want to find out what your wholeness of soul looks like. So hop on over to magnify community on Instagram to join in the conversation. I think one thing that I am going to take away from this conversation, and that is going to stay with me is that our identity is already divinely defined, and that when we return to Jesus Christ, we can receive a wholeness of our soul. Thanks for being here and hop on over to Instagram at magnify community for more inspiration and conversation. And of course, subscribe and listen to the Magnify podcast wherever you get your shows. Let's meet up again next week.